Rob's Blog: NRL Grand Final 2018

MELBOURNE STORM vs SYDNEY ROOSTERS

Sunday 30th September 2018

On NRL Grand Final Day, I reposted all my previous NRL grand final entries to my Facebook page (give it a like!).

The 2018 edition combines the best elements of the three earlier editions:

It's really late, like 2015's The Latest and Best Review of the NRL Grand Final You Will Ever Read;
It's in a diary format, like NRL Grand Final Diary 2016; and
Uhh, it has words and pictures about the game, like NRL Grand Final 2017 (I was struggling to extend the introduction).

Let's get to this!

Watch the first forty minutes of the WNRL Grand Final, before toddler O starts screaming, so we switch over to Dinosaur Train.
See snippets of the State Championship game while trying to get all the kids to have a nap and/or clean up their toys.
I sense a worrying trend.
Miss the pre-match entertainment. I did record it, because I'm sad, and later watched the retirees parade. The parade is very underwhelming as a spectacle, but it was the greatest cohort of retiring players since, well, maybe ever. Although for some reason retiring Eels back Kirisome Auva'a wasn't featured...
My watching of the recording also got interrupted by kids, so I will never know who Gang of Youths are. Why yes, I am old.
We had family coming over at 6pm, for dinner and the match, thinking kick-off was 8pm. At 7pm, realise it actually starts in 20 minutes.
Start feeding the six kids in our house at 710pm.
Watch the opening exchanges on the second television from the dining room, while supervising O eating. Great pass by Keary to Tupou for the first try.
Here is the exact moment where Latrell Mitchell earned a Kangaroos jersey, and Will Chambers lost his...

Left step, try, goodbye.
It would get worse for Chambers as the night wore on. Mitchell is definitely the best centre in the game without unresolved drink driving charges against him.
Move to the living room and the main TV. Can't hear anything as the kids are playing indoor hide and seek. But it's pretty obvious that the Roosters are completely, unexpectedly dominating. Keary is having a blinder, and Cronk is basically doing nothing but direct traffic. Kind of like Allan Langer at the Broncos for the last fifteen years, but with the risk of being tackled.

'Alfie' Langer, about 30 years into his 43 years
of first grade and rep footy.
J suddenly realises he is missing the game and sits with me to watch. Long enough to tell me his favourite team is "the Dragons! And the Bulldogs and the Roosters!"

You can actually pinpoint the second my heart rips in half.
After five minutes, he decides he'd rather be involved with the other game (hide and seek).
Miss the third try, because something, something kids fault.
The key moment in the second half has to be when Munster has a three-on-two, makes the wrong decision to dummy instead of pass, still gets through the line, only for Manu to slap his arm to dislodge the ball in a desperate cover tackle.
"The Fox" Addo-Carr scores an intercept try five minutes later to reduce the margin to 12, but it doesn't feel like the start of a comeback.
It is over when Keary pots a field goal (despite a pretty ordinary pass from dummy half). Slater protests that he is obstructed in his charge-down attempt. It looks like a dive. But surely Slater has never tried to earn penalty through diving before?
It's really hard to understand why Slater spent his last footy game being mercilessly booed...
There is a heated discussion about eating pavlova now or after full-time. And the hide and seek has been replaced by light saber battles.
Next year, I'm running away to watch the footy.
After that earlier error, and with his side crashing to defeat, at least Munster has maintained his dignity. That's not something your just going to kick away...

Oh, wait.
The penalty kick from Munster's footwork makes it 21-6. It's a flattering scoreline for the losers, as this was probably the most lopsided grand final since that time they lost 40-0.
Post-match, it is revealed that Cronk's "severe" rotator cuff injury was actually a "fractured scapula", or broken shoulder blade, as normal people call it. Amazing bravery to play crippled, but I must admit I think the deception involved is bad for the game. I'm not going to defend gambling, but while it exists, the lack of transparency on injuries and selections leaves the sport open to potential 'insider trading' scenarios. The NFL discloses injuries accurately, and the NRL should do the same.
Also what if this was a regular season game and the Roosters lies wrecked my fantasy football team?! Unacceptable!
Cronk's injury isn't the only one. Here is the full casualty ward report from the Grand Final: